Tips to Have a Happy Marriage with Asperger's
Tips to Have a Happy Marriage with Asperger's
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Don't just blame your partner
Your partner is not only
responsible for your relationship problems. "The real problem lies in the
combination of the two different ways of existence.
It's not your partner's
fault that he doesn't understand certain social expectations, just as it's not
your fault that you don't understand how the pipes in your house work.
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Learn more about AS
If you don't know much
about AS, it's easy to misinterpret your partner's actions and think they don't
care.
Educating yourself on how
AS's actions can be a great help in better understanding and empathizing with
your partner. People with AS do not act on information the way everyone does.
Using brain scans has
shown differences in brain structure and the shape of people with AS versus AS.
·
Correct your partner's behavior
You may think that your
partner knows what you need but deliberately ignores it or does something to
hurt you on purpose.
And when you think your
partner is cold and angry, you not only get upset and angry, but you can also
see all their actions and intentions in a negative light.
Improving your partner's
behavior helps you focus on your relationship and work to improve it. It can
also help you come up with creative solutions.
·
Be specific about your needs
Many of us expect our
partners to automatically know what we want. Or to find out what we want after
so many gestures.
In fact, it is rare. And it's not specifically with AS partners. Instead of expecting your partner to naturally know what you want or point out, talk about your needs as specifically and directly as possible. This can be difficult because you think you are already very clear.
·
Talk about how you want to connect
with each other
Because you and your
partner experience emotions differently, it can be difficult to have an
emotional relationship.
Remember that people with
AS have difficulty understanding and recognizing emotions, and they may show
very few emotions or express inappropriate emotions.
You may also miss the display of deep
connection by your partner because you express emotions in different ways.
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